I don’t know why but I want to change my name, my identity, maybe use one of my many unknown names, like Kiki,
{My lil’ sister never knew how to pronounce all my names, so to her, that was “Nicki”}
To start over, with new faces, a new family, a new school, new friends, new location, new clothes, new hair, new glasses, new shoes, new phone, a new birth certificate written “Kiki ” yes, just one name.
A new start, I want to see if in that world, things will be any different from this world. If Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Pinrest, Linkden, Tellonym, Interpals,YouTube, will be such a big deal in that life. If school will be interesting, if cancer will have a cure or if HIV will be just like malaria.
If being gay won’t be a big deal, if elections won’t cause wars, if racism will be a thing of the past, where money will not control the society,if we would just serve one God despite the many religions, if the rich won’t be at the top most of the hierarchy , if there will be a true Brotherhood.
I’ll want to know if in that life I would have had my first kiss before 18, if I would have found” The One”, if I would have had a complete family, if I would have a good heart like now, if I would be oversize, skinny or petite , if I would cherish every moment of it. I want to know if giving birth would be a painful experience as it is now. If in that life, there’d be another Dan, another Mark, another Jean, another Mory, maybe a new Hillary, another Ellen,or Mo, a different May, but the same me with a new identity.
I wonder if all this would be possible, how many of us would change times and opt to be someone else, would ya’ll miss what you have left behind? Would you take a few of the people who make you you if it was an option, would ya’ll regret later after the transition to go back?, but what if there was no way back? Would you spend the rest of it trying to relive what you left behind?
If I was told to choose, I’d take my time, and that time is the gift I’d give the few people in my life, cause that is the best thing you can ever give to someone, because you know what, it is one thing you can never get back,so please, don’t rush things, live life minute after minute, hour after hour, day after day, week by week, take your,
TIME🎀
Music by some guy, I’ve had a crush on a while back in some fest Wells, but we friends now🥰 , enjoy!
Lately, I have been watching a lot of series during my free time. I don’t know why, but I tend to smile hard when the characters in the movie kiss, whether straight or gay. Sometimes I cover my eyes with my hands, like a kid, shy of watching adults getting intimate. Like when Arch and Veronica , Jughead and Betty from Riverdale do it, Henry and Patty from insatiable , Jace and Clarie from The Shadow hunters.
Nolan likes asking if High School in the States means just going to prom, kissing, having sex,going to parties and some homecoming stuff, doing drugs, getting into gangs , well, I can’t give her that answer but sure, it’s what we pretty much made to believe in almost all the TV shows and movies we been watching lately. At least they do most of all that.
I remember my friend from primary school once pecked me on the cheek behind the classroom door after lying to me that he wanted to tell me a secret and made me swear never to tell anyone, so I said “I promise”, I won’t tell no one, he told me to close my eyes, the next thing, I felt his lips on my right cheek, before I opened my eyes, he was gone, so I think that was my first kiss, I guess😂😂😊 . It was really romantic and all .And yes, I’ve never told no one out of the possible fifty who were in my class, see, am loyal😂
My second was when we had gone on this school educational tour, for lack of a better name, and my best friend kissed me on the forehead a couple f times, I don’t know but I think I loved all the couple of times😂🥴.
Sometimes , I wonder which girl is texting their other halves , they be like ,
“I love you your very special I will never Love anyone else I would rather be single and on my own. This heart beats for you and you alone my one and only forever and ever…”🥴🌹
or maybe guys be like telling their buddies how they messed up
“Learn from my mistake, I took for granted the person who loved me so much she had given me so many chances but all I did was hurt her again and again, I didn’t give her enough time, I was so busy with my life, focusing too much on my future that I forgot that I’m loosing her, we’ve been together for almost 9 years. And this song reminds me that I wish I could be the guy who can love her the way she loves me.” 😂 😔 😢
I got nothing against relationships but until I find that someone who treats me like I matter, who shows me that I’m worth being loved all the time, not just sometimes, worth being missed always, who’ll call back after getting a missed call to confirm whether my world was ending or if I’ve had water, if I can see well, someone who won’t mind keeping tabs on me always, someone who will always make time, who’ll not treat me like his plus one,one who’ll push all my buttons, annoy me, then make me smile after seconds, one who’ll say “I need space” after an argument cause no one said it’ll be easy, I know am making it sound like some fairy tale or some wild imagination but I know someone out there has all this flaws but still…still
When we finally find each other, all these imperfections won’t matter, because no one is perfect, absolutely no one. Someone who won’t be afraid of losing me cause you can never lose what was never yours, right?
Hang in there, there’s no rush, trust me 🌹.
I was thinking, do you remember your first kiss?🥴😂😂
15 hours ago, I was on a ride of my life, the one you guys call “ride or die”. This was really that like literally ride or die. Around 12 midnight , we set our minds that we was going to go for a morning run from around 5.30 in the morning . I had trouble sleeping so me and my cousin room chatted, I wasn’t really sure if I was going to wake up the next morning or not.
So I thought if I was going to die, I’d rather sit back and count my blessings, my mistakes and clear my conscience,but am sure some of ya’ll would spend it drinking or doing whatever. Haven’t checked my notifications {IT’S LITERALLY AT 732} on YouTube just before I did, I tapped on James Arthur’s song, “Can I be him”,
I swear I cried, for almost an hour, I don’t know why, I just did,
was I afraid I was dying ?,
was I afraid I didn’t try to make it work ? but instead put you before the feelings I had for you?,
was I afraid what might happen when am gone ?,
was I afraid who’d take my unfinished script ?,
who’d launch and brand my designs?,
Who’d live up to my dreams, ambitions, goals?
was I afraid who’d wear my clothes? , was I afraid who’d listen when they needed someone to be there?
was I afraid I’d never get my first kiss, have a true love story, get my heart broken, be a Dj at some important function like launching my first written screenplay?
was I really afraid, or was I just feeling pain…
I fail to answer all this questions and when Arthur pushed his notes on the song, I felt like I wanted to scream and be at the same level as his singing, afraid to close my eyes, afraid I might not open them again, I watched a some of Trevor Noah’s comedy on YouTube, read a couple of blogs and just when I got tired, the alarm went off for our morning run, it was 5.30 am, in the morning, Nolan said I don’t really have to go if they’ll end up carrying me all the way back home, I figured if I was to be dead, I’d better be running my last laps than sleeping on the couch.
“All beings, be it plants , animals or human walk a path on a journey for an answer…
Every day hundreds of journeys end, but that does not stop the ones who loved them from stopping because they know that they will meet again at the end.
So if I am to fall, please, keep walking and I’ll wait for you at the finish line.”
“If you fall… then I will carry you until you can walk again.
We’re friends right?
We can walk the same path and I’ll make sure we pass the finish line together.
So… don’t worry about falling over. I’ll pick you up again and patch up your wounds. We will make it to the end.”
You were like a sad and hurt caterpillar trying to become a butterfly…🦋
Until I found you… That I saw your transformation…🤔
But if only I knew.. That you would leave…😒
After I fell in love with you… 😕
You told me to find another butterfly to help…😏
Now that you were a beautiful one yourself.. 😷
But you’d never understand…🚶♀️
That in my heart…❤
You were the last butterfly…🤡🦋
One smile can start a friendship
One word can stop a fight
One look can save a relationship
One hug can spark a hope
One touch can bring a warmth
One whisper can bring assurance
One decision can stop a war
One cooperation can bring abundance
One kiss can bring a kindness
One sleep can bring rest
One wake can bring happiness
One solution can stop the tests
If we only learn to smile to a stranger, to stop the fight, to start a relationship, to spark a hope, to embrace with warmth, to speak assurances, to end the war, to give abundance, to pass forward kindness, to allow rest, to share happiness, then maybe we can pass God’s test!
Everything has an end, but there is also something called a beginning. “A NEW” beginning.
There may be the last leaf, but there is a new seed.
There may be the last chip, but there is a new bag.
There may be the last life in a video game, but there is a new game.
There may be the last episode, but there is a new season.
There may be the last chapter, but there is a new book.
There may be the last chance, but there is a new opportunity.
There may be the last goodbye, but there is a new hello.
There may be the last butterfly, but there is a new caterpillar.
Things have an end and die, but things also begin and live.”
Watch the stars Maybe you’ll see me Don’t forget me Don’t cry for me Because
I’m alive In your past In your heart In your head
Three words I can sum up everything I’ve learnt about life
It goes on
I’m not sad or depressed. Just tired. Really tired of everything.
The prettiest smile hides the deepest secrets, The prettiest eyes have cried the most tears, And the kindest hearts have felt the most pain❤ .
All good things eventually come to an end, but the journey is what makes it worthwhile.
If you put your hand over your heart, you’ll feel a little something called a heartbeat. No matter how fast or slow, it’s there, and it’s a constant reminder that you were put on this world for a reason, that YOUR life matters, YOU’RE worth something. Don’t be afraid to make a difference. Dare to inspire yourself and those around you. YOU are a like a puzzle piece in this world; eventually, we all fit together to make one big puzzle that can change the world. Don’t give up. Remember to persevere. You matter.
Whenever I fall down…… I feel pain…
Whenever someone hurts me… I feel pain…
Whenever someone tells me, I’m not good enough…
I feel pain… And it hurts… and…I feel… sad.
But it’s not the pain that hurts… it’s me
The people that lost someone your not alone, to the people that are hated the people that are being hurt please understand your not the only one. Your perfect in many ways no matter shape or form no matter what religion you believe in your still human to me, the people that are getting bullied please read this be yourself . Don’t let them stand in your way just know your gonna do amazing in the future and I believe in you! To the people that lost someone understand that there is a better place to cry for them let them be a memory, they are always there for you no matter where you go. To the people that lie understand this lies don’t get you anywhere, to the people that are hurt note this: I know you done something stupid I have as well but you know that’s better than regret.
~ In you darkest time
~ Remember you hope
~ And you will be fine
~ In your sorrow
~ Rise, from the dark
~ Rise from your ashes
~ Rise through the sky
~ Rise through the sun
~ Always remember
~ That even the darkest cloud
~ Still have their golden part
How does one rise? The attainment to something great, the accomplishment of some heroic feat, The recognition of those around. In this world there are many who despite their best efforts have failed to accomplish what they would deem heroic, to attain to anything they would view as great, however I believe that the true meaning of this comes from within.It is the action of rising the resolve to not remain the same, a will to improve, to become better, to overcome the personal flaws we all face in our daily lives and to strive for a more perfect existence within our own conscience. We only know how far we have risen when we look down. A moment of clarity that shows us we are not what we were and not what we will become.
Don’t grieve that the thing or people you love the most are gone. Be happy that it was there with you at some point of life
In the darkest times when we think that nothing can be done, we hear the voice of God and he gives us strength to overcome our strongest and most powerful enemies, and then we realize that the battle wins not the strongest person, but person who believes in something who is stronger than you? God who created him, God who gave him so much, and then we see how wonderful God created the wonderful world.
The darkest hour of the night is always just before the sun rises
me and my best friend had a scuffle, haven’t been on the best terms lately but honestly, I’ve learnt to accept that I care too much but, that’s jut me, can’t be selfish or change cause people changing in on me, am different, trust me, and learn to stay away when you nah needed in the picture cause I guess, the frame got small for 3 heads, took mine off. Little did I know the same night, that same night I said I was taking time off is the same night Rayshard Brooks was forcibly given a long term break.
It’s 12-06-2020 and it’s around 23.22 pm when Rayshard makes the last run alive, and in the 49th second,Rayshad Brooks would’ve been alive the next Monday or Friday. How long, I mean how much?
When is it enough, huh?
Rayshard was in his car, chilling, drunk or maybe tipsy fell asleep , meant no harm to no one,in a Wendy’s drive thru . Same story line as Floyd’s , someone at the drive thru calls the cops, they sure do come and get him out of the car, this time in a more civilized manner , for about 30 minutes. Asking him if he drunk and all those sorta questions . Sure , they’re not being mean , disrespectful or anything . Brooks on the other hand is being so respectful . He ain’t cursing, he’s calling them sir, offering to walk them home to her sister’s apartment. It’s until the end where the police try and arrest him, he resists, wrestle with police and all of us in the back of our minds kinda guess where this is going to end, in the scuffle, they try and taze him, he grabs the tazzer gets up and runs away.
The police chase him as he’s running, one cop switches his tazzer to a gun and shoots him 2 or 3 times in the back, and he’s dead. I mean, he posed no threat to no one, no one at Wendy’s complained. But maybe if he wasn’t black we would still be alive. The riots going on in the States right about this moment of the year is a mass mobilization unlike nothing I have never seen before! See, since Floyd’s Death properties been destroyed,looted, the latest being the Wendy’s drive thru, police making the situation worse by brutally beating up protesters, arresting them, teargassing by standers, Fucking Batman showed up! I mean , wtf? Someone’s father, friend, uncle, cousin , son-in-law, nephew, son and companion, has been deprived the right to live in the present and plan for the future. It’s gonna be a long time before the family heals.
I mean, the country is burning down because of what we all know. First off, no black man walked to thee United States and lived there. We was kidnapped, we was raided, we was beaten, our homes were set ablaze. We learnt to call the same place home because it is the same place we was born. Most of us can’t retrace our footsteps back to Africa and say I’m from Kenya, am from Mozambique, am from South Africa, because we found ourselves were we found ourselves!
I mean, we fought for this same country, heart and soul because that then was our job, labored and lived a low life, demeaning life but how long ago was that. The 4th of July 1776, and what? We still wanna do things the old school way, how sick is that? That’s 239 years down the line , how many decades? And nothing changed!
George Floyd -46 we all know his story. we all do
Breanor Taylor-26 Sleeping in her home, police breaks in, Kenneth , her boyfriend thinks intruders broke in, grabs his Licensed gun shooting an officer in the leg, then boom!, they strike back firing 20 bullets, 8 hitting Bre, and just like that she dead. Nearly 3 months later, the cops are still on the job! No charges,, no nothing.
AURRA SOSSER -40 Her boyfriend Stephens calls 911 to help him get her out of the house because of an altercation , on arrival , Rosser was holding a knife and refused to drop it. One police fires a single shot that kills her,the police were nah fired but this was when the police department advanced on body cams, 2014
STEPHON CLARK– 22 He got shot 20 times while holding a cellphone at his grandma’s backyard, how fucked up is that?
I mean I don’t wanna go deep to the list cause it just get’s crazier!
We watch police brutality daily in movies, in TV shows
The hate you give
All American
Cops
Orange is the New black
Just Mercy
Selma
The color purple
BlacKKKlansman
And the children shall lead
Sistas
If Beale Street Could Talk
Lucifer
13TH
Straight Outta Compton
When They See Us
Insecure
Black-ish
BlackAF
I mean I could mention up to a hundred of these shows but what is the use if ya’ll gonna watch and not learn from all of them, huh?
20% Of Muslims in America are black and trust me, they don’t even like praying in the same mosques. Bollywood stars do skin whitening commercials so they don’t look black! They love seeing how high a black person can ascend in America but they have done nothing, to raise the floor, that’s what’s these protest are about . But then what? We still see a section of blind racists some pulling chain sows on peaceful protesters, some yelling to them faces, and for what?
“Are they are afraid of the revolution, afraid that they may lose their white privilege?”
LONDON, ENGLAND – JUNE 10: Sead Kolasinac, Nicolas Pepe, Matteo Guendouzi and Alexandre Lacazette of Arsenal take a knee in support of Black Lives Matter before the friendly match between Arsenal and Brentford at Emirates Stadium on June 10, 2020 in London, England.
The words ‘Black Lives Matter@ are pictured on the shirts of Sheffield United’s English-born Northern Irish midfielder Oliver Norwood (L) and Sheffield United’s English striker Billy Sharp during the English Premier League football match between Aston Villa and Sheffield United at Villa Park in Birmingham, central England on June 17, 2020. – The Premier League makes its eagerly anticipated return today after 100 days in lock down but behind closed doors due to corona virus restrictions.
The Premier League kicked off on Thursday this week , and guess what? All the players had their jersey’s Printed on BLACK LIVES MATTER! And that is sure the best way to pass the message cause almost the whole globe watch football, learn people, learn!
The faster white people accept and validate the truth the faster we’ll come to a place of peace and understanding. Fighting racism is dependent upon them using their privilege for the right reasons.
The worst people in society, have taken control!
But imagine if you lived in a country that the color of your skin got you killed! For driving, jogging,, sleeping , yelling , parking , baby sitting, sitting in a van, selling CD’s , selling cigarettes ,opening the door, walking at night,holding a toy gun, holding a cellphone, wearing a hoodie at night , being homeless, lying on the ground, exercising horses , having a bottle of pills, shopping at Walmart,holding a phone in your own grandma’s backyard,eating ice cream in your own house and shopping!
If the USA saw what is going on in the USA . The USA would invade USA to free the USA from the USA
I love Wild n’ Out, cause there, you are just you, get roasted , but still be you, they joke bout yoh past, make you feel but still you have fun. That is the only place apart from the rap game where black people and white people get to joke about racism and still, them jokes hold the truth, and no one fight, well, they get heated once in a while but they never got physical . Nick being roasted time and again about Moriah, it made me think about this guy, I miss him though, but, he not worth it, well it was good while it lasted, we was stupid teens naming our kids before we had them, I don’t know how this will get to you but either way,
Molly says she’s the dark poet, well it’s true cause her work is great💪💪🏽
I thought I was ready for us though, that we was ready😌
Right now, I realize I woulda been feeling the great heat🔥
Although we both knew we was onto nothing🙄, but at least we was a thing😑 .
Am grateful you offered something😏
Well, you was living the lush life, but I was getting loffe 😞
Everyday each day, until the last day🤢.
Honestly, I was warned, but I knew even if you was playing🤔,
deep down, you was genuine, that’s why I started climbing you like a bine 😤.
I slowly started coming down when I realized, you was too good to be true🥴.
No hard feelings, even though we don’t talk no more🙄
Hope you grew some deep voice😏, if not, swallow yoh Adam’s apple🥱,
This is a rare screenshot of a conversation I been having ,these are literally the best lines I’ve heard this year
You are my responsibility
You know, you don’t always hear this from the people you expect, be grateful for the few who are there at your lowest, even when you can’t see well. Trust me, it feels really good, especially if your just complaining about nothing but they still listen to your nonsense and tell everything is OK.
Escrevo romance e fantasia, além de oferecer serviços editoriais como leitura crítica, consultoria em escrita criativa e diagramação de e-books. Saiba mais explorando o site ou entrando em contato!
Coco👣 
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